He was sitting on the couch watching Clifford (his fave) when I ran across our former foster sons' adoptive profile on a northwest special needs adoption photolisting. R & M were there, smiling from their bulletin with their sister. They've still not managed to move the 3 in together as the family who was going to adopt all 3 backed out. They became aware that they couldn't meet R's needs while parenting their other children. That's exactly where we found ourselves after 5 days with the 2 boys. Solomon was hanging in great, Malachi was doing really well, too. They're old enough to understand some things about what the boys had been through. It was little Levi who struggled. And thus, Micah and me.
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It was such an incredibly hard decision to make. Although they had only been with us for 5 days, I knew another move would not be helping them. I knew if they stayed, Levi wouldn't do well. Such beautiful boys. So much potential. If only given time to heal, and the chance to know unconditional love. With prayer and sweat and probably some tears, they could thrive!
But what about Levi?
So torn. Such guilt.
I never saw their sister, and now I see her for the first time with her brothers. What a cutie. Her caseworker told me that she was so frustrated with her hair that she snuck scissors and chopped it. She needs a mom to take her to a salon and teach her how to work with it. I'm rambling, here, I know. I just want a good family for them so badly. I want them to have the childhood that they were robbed of.
***
Please pray for S, R & M.
1 comment:
So hard.We recently saw a listing of our 1st fosterson,whom at the time was not legally free and plans were for reunification,so we let him go allthough we begged to adopt him.Its now been 5 years and he is in a mental hospital setting at age 6 and TPR is just now in the works.If only we could have kept him we think,such potential,his IQ was sky high,his athletic ability was amazing.Its heart breaking to think of his future now.
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